One Step toward Empowering Women

Earlier this year, Mark and I preached on women and men working together for the kingdom at our home church. We talked about the scriptural evidence calling men and women to work together side by side, equally empowered and equal in authority.

We also talked about the hard work involved in not just changing our beliefs, but also actually living out those changed beliefs by learning to lead together in marriage and in the church.

In our brief thirty minutes, we barely got started on this complex and nuanced, but incredibly important, topic. In my blog, I hope to begin addressing this topic on a deeper level.

In the weeks leading up to our message, God began moving in my heart in a way I’ve rarely experienced before. It felt like he had implanted a piece of his heart about this topic into me. I’ve cared about this topic for many years, but this was different. Though I’m not normally much of a crier, I found myself frequently overcome with tears and intercession. I could not stop weeping about the experience of women in the church and the ways we have fallen so far short of God’s vision for us when he created us to co-lead in the Garden of Eden.

This wasn’t about my personal experience, but about our corporate experience and God’s desire to see us step into maturity in this area. 

Then, during worship one Sunday morning, I had a powerful encounter with God. In my mind, I saw myself standing on the stage at our church, preaching the message, and I said to the women, “Some of you have experienced abuse and overt silencing in the church. For others of you, it’s been more like death by a thousand papercuts.” And as I said that, I started weeping, and I felt overwhelmed with grief. I knew I was feeling the collective pain of so many women over so many years—the grief of lost callings and silenced voices.

The next morning, when I woke up, God immediately brought that vision back to my mind, and he said to me, “You weren’t just feeling their pain. You were feeling my pain too.”

I shared this encounter in our message a few weeks later as an illustration of God’s deep grief over the way women have often been silenced or sidelined in the church. Understanding this is a crucial first step toward living out co-leadership. If our hearts begin to burn with God’s passion for this, we will not stop pursuing the biblical vision of equal empowerment and authority for both women and men.

For women to show up, we need to believe God not only invites us, but also longs for us to step up and fully become the people he made us to be.

And once we believe it, we need to start taking brave steps. For very many of us, in the cultures we live in, taking these steps will have consequences. This is true for both men and women. Recognizing what may happen can help bolster our resolve when it does.

When I first felt God speak to me about using my voice on this issue, I felt reluctant. I knew the cost other women had paid in this arena. It’s scary to stand up and say women’s voices matter, knowing some will strongly disagree, because it’s personal. It’s not just a theological question, but a question about my own value as a human. When people throw their rocks, they aim them at me—at my personhood, at my identity, at my calling.

But here I am, speaking up anyway, because Jesus is calling. He longs to see women take their place alongside men—raising their voices in service of his kingdom. To get to that reality, both men and women need to be willing to risk the criticism, the pushback, the anger.

Of course, while some will oppose women’s voices overtly, many others will discount them subtly. Often, even those who have good intentions can end up discounting women’s voices without realizing it. We are wired as humans to do things how we’ve always done them. To prioritize what feels comfortable and safe.

But to empower women’s voices, we need to be not only willing, but also intentional and strategic about how we do that.

We do not all have the same ability to promote female leadership within any particular church, but we do all have the ability to promote the leadership of women in our own lives and in our circles of influence. Here are three simple things we can all do that will intentionally increase our experience of female leadership in the church and help us take steps toward God’s design for male and female co-leadership:

1. Seek out guidance, advice, and mentorship from both men and women.

2. Purposefully read books and listen to messages and podcasts by women.

3. Tell your friends and family members about ways God has used female leaders in your life.

I know this list is basic, and for many women, it probably feels insufficient. Yet, cultural change happens one step at a time. We change one habit. We change one belief. And step by step, we begin to change the way we think and act.

We cannot expect the church to change all in a moment, but we can strategically invest in that change.

What do you think? What other steps would you add to this list?

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